Today’s Topic & What You’ll Learn
- The history of how we are programmed to stop thinking outside the box & how we can overcome the “average thinking” to achieve more
- How to make a goal, come up with a plan, and how to execute
While writing my 2019 goals it occurred to me. When did people stop dreaming? If I were to ask you, what are some of your goals and dreams you want to accomplish this year, would you have an answer right away without really thinking about it? There have been countless times I ask this question to friends and family members and it’s astounding at the number of people that give me the same response….”Um….well….I don’t know. I haven’t really thought about it.”
Did you know that if you have no idea where you want to be, you may already be there? Let that one sink in for a few moments…..
Where It All Started
It all stems back to our early years as young children. For the average person, we are usually raised by at least one of our parents in the baby years of our lives. Then, the parent(s) have to return to work and we are sent to daycare, friends, family or some form of childcare until we reach the school-aged years. Unless you had a stay-at-home-parent. While being at home and in other child minding facilities, we are encouraged to use our imagination. Asked to think outside the box. We play house with dolls, or complete races with dinky cars. We have stories read to us and we imagine what it would be like to be that fairy princess or the king of the town. We envision having all the money in the world or being a doctor saving lives.
Getting A Little Older
We then transition into Junior Kindergarten and attend a school with teachers that still encourage free play and using our imaginations. But what happens when we get to Grade 1 and up? Did you ever take notice of what “really starts to happen”? All of a sudden it’s, “Johnny, pay attention and stop doodling on your paper.” “Becky, the instructions stay to follow step 1 to 4 for a reason.” Robert, I asked you to draw a picture of a house you wanted to live in. Why did you draw a castle?” From a young age of 5 or 6, we start to be programmed to stop dreaming and stick to exactly what is being asked of us. Very rarely asked to think outside the box anymore. Even when we are, the people asking always have “their
Mingling With The Big Kids
Fast forward a few years later and we are in Grade 8 where the schools ask you what you want to be when you grow up so you can pick the right courses for high school next year. When you tell them you want to be a dancer you get the, “Well, they don’t make much money and it’s super competitive. You should pick something else.” Maybe your a girl but really enjoy the mechanics of how things work and you tell them you want to be a mechanic and you get, “It’s maybe really hard to get hired because you are a girl. Do you like cooking? You could try for that instead? That may be better suited for you.” The comments are endless and I know so many people who had an idea of what they wanted to be when they grew up, but something or someone changed their mind.
College & Univeristy
Skip over to college or university – if you decide to go that far and we choose a program that we think will get us good grades and the good job. But what about the reality of the situation. Why do we strive for just good grades? What happen to our inner child of imagination. What did you REALLY want to be when you grew up and why are you not there now? Usually, the reason is fear and we stopped dreaming of what “could be” and are settling for what the “normal” is.
Why You Don’t Have More
Many of us at one point in our lives had an idea where we wanted to go and who we wanted to be. However, society had ingrained into our subconscious to stop believing we can do whatever we want in life. We have been told over and over our whole lives from friends and family to not take risks or to keep it safe. As a result, we end up in mediocre jobs, making less than desired wages, living lives we feel are incomplete….asking why do I not have more?
Ways To Fix This Problem?
How To Solve This – We need to accept the fact for years we have forgotten about our inner child. We need to tap back into that fearless creature and remember who we once were at the core. Do you remember the last time you had a desire of a job or something you wanted to aquire? Maybe it was a vacation you wanted to go on. Did you think about it on a regular basis, or was it just a passing thought? Make it a regular thought and dream about it as much as you can. They say the more you talk to yourself and visualize about a deam or a goal as if you already have it or have achieved it, your subconscious will actually try to find ways to aquire that desire. Sound crazy? Look it up! So we need to start thinking about what we really want in life and start making a plan to get there. How?
- Think About What You Want – Brainstorm things you want in your life. This can be literally anything and they do NOT have to be 100% realistic. If you dream you want to be rich, visualize it. If you want to have an amazing vacation in Rome, visualize it. If you just want a nice weekend with family, visualize it. Do Not set limits. Dream Big or Go Home.
- Write It Down – I have books that mention more goals and dreams are accomplished when they have been written down. Why? Because you can constantly be reminded where you want to go or what you want to achieve. Plus, you won’t forget and you have acknowledged to your brain what you are looking for.
- Make A Plan – Once you have your goals and dreams, come up with a plan on how you will actually get there. What steps would need to be taken to actually achieve it? Sometimes it can be hard to figure out what you need to get to your goal by working from where you are now. Instead, imagine where you “would be” and go backwards. Example: You want to be an Insurance Broker. Okay, I know that seems like a weird goal, but it was mine, so
barewith me. So..prior to being the Broker, I need a license. How do I get the license? I need to take a course. Where is the course? I need to find one. Then schedule it. Etc….kind of see where I’m going with that?
- Be As Specific As Possible – Saying you want to buy a house is great, but describe to me the house you want. Is it brick or vinal. Does it have a chimney? What colour is it? Where is it located? Describe to me the land it is on? Etc. When I talk specific, I mean down to the type of grass you want on your property. The more details you can put in your dream/goal the more your mind can try to make it happen.
- Create A Realistic Time Frame – Maybe you want to be a teacher. You made the plan on how you will get there, the courses you need to take, and even figured out what you will specialize in. But how long will you give yourself to get there? Do you want to be a teacher in 2 years, maybe 5? For myself, I want to monetize my Blog by the end of this year! If you are not already, come up with a plan that is realistic to you to achieve this.
Not Letting Fear Hold You Back
Don’t let the fear of others hold you back from anything you want in life. There have been so many times I have attempted something I really wanted and others kept telling me it wasn’t going to work out, or that it was a bad idea. A great example for me was working for an insurance company selling life insurance. I had to call from a referral list, go to their homes and propose the product. This was 100% commission. If I didn’t make a sale, I didn’t get paid. For the four months I worked this position, which I was self-employed, I made the most money I ever have in my life. Family and friends kept trying to discourage me saying I would never make enough to live off of, I need to be careful or I may not make anything. What if this, what if that. That job changed my life and it allowed me to see what limits I really had on myself and I tore down a wall of fear that had been holding me back. Due to that job, I know now I can do anything I want in life, achieve anything I want and I won’t ever let someone else decide for me. If you are wondering why I am not in that position anymore…well…baby Rylan happen and it’s not really a job to have when you have small children.
Anywho, figure out what you want and just go for it. Regardless of the odds or the steps you need to take to get there. Regardless of what everyone else thinks. Sure, your path to get there is likely to change over time. Especially if it is a goal that is set up farther out, but
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